Calendar Credits

December

Of course being the King means I get to give a Christmas Message... I'll need ot think carefully about what I want to tell you all about my wonderful year...

November

October

September

“Sorrow can be alleviated by good sleep, a bath and a glass of wine"

At least according to St. Thomas Aquinas.
I am saddened when I must leave my adoring minions.
However I will take St Thomas's advice and
have a good soak,

some sleep


and a box of chocolate (I'm King and I don't do wine).

August

Spotted

Ten extra minion points* to anyone who can spot the polarbear.
*Minion points can not be exchanged for any goods made from or related to chocolate.

Bejewelled

I have new crown jewels. Bow all before my majesty.

Expenses

My loyal minions.

I know I have been quiet and have not regaled you with the tales from my royal household. This is merely due to some serious issues I have had to address. I have had to investigate some illegal expenses claims made by my representatives. It appears that my loyal team have been siphoning off extra chocolate biscuits and brownies from the royal mint to have with their "second breakfast" I can assure you there will be no more flagrant abuse of my chocolate accounting procedures.

Having now resolved that issue. I have embarked on my Royal Summer Tour of 2009 with three of my most loyal minions. I believe there will be chocolate cake in my honour on Friday (one of the minions has requested one for me specially on her birthday) and then we will be touring this fine nation. No chocolate shop shall go unsullied.

Your benevolent and mighty ruler,

King Dumbledore

July

June

May

Does a bear s*** in the woods?

Not this polar bear.

This polar bear visits a fully plumbed, flushing, running water, locking, clean convenience.

Nothing so uncivilized as a wood for the royal behind. Thank you very much.

*ahem* do you mind looking the other way, I'm busy here.

It is essential to keep one's paws clean for all that chocolate. No nasty bugs on me!

One always enjoys a blow dry to add that extra fluffiness element

One last check in the mirror to ensure 100% perfection! I'm ready to face my adoring minions once again.

Dispatches

My normal minions have gone on a scouting mission to Wisconsin. I have heard tell that the one named Palin is no longer a possible threat to my polar bear brethren but I felt that I needed first hand evidence that the believer Obama truly is the "ruler" of the United States (obviously I am supreme ruler of all the known universe but I cannot deal with the nitty gritty so I allow those mere humans to play the game of "politics".)

Since I would not wish to fend for myself for this time I have come to the safe haven that is my second most loyal minions. They treat me with great respect. They have even purchased rather fetching carrying devices, matching ones too. Not sure I care for the colour but I must admit I can be seen in a crowd which suits me just fine.

April

Corporate Sponsorship

As you, my loyal followers and minions, know I am grand overlord and benevolent (when it suits me) ruler of all that I survey.

I rule not only the lowly peoples of this world but also receive tribute from the many corporate entities who benefit from my kindly and supportive rule. On a recent tour I was given a substantial tribute by one of the largest corporations that support me.

Here I am at a Starbucks receiving one very large gold covered chocolate coin (the best kind) and a very welcoming Hot Chocolate on a rather chilly, even for this handsome polar bear, morning.

Benevolence

In my role as benevolent leader I have taken on the duty of learning from those who came before my most majestic self.

In my study of Marie Antoinette I feel I am able to enhance her policy of "let them eat cake". Quite obviously where she went wrong is that she should have stated "let them eat chocolate cake".

This is one of the founding principles of my dominion. Chocolate cake for all, so long as I have the largest slice.

March

The Royal Mint

My royal mint is effective but sometimes it is a nuisance having to carry around all of those heavy gold coins. It seems that my minions find it makes their bags too heavy to carry and being the benevolent leader I am I have decided to use printed money. I don't normally do tasks for myself but I would never give my PIN to any of my mere minions, the accounts are full of my hard collected donations from my devoted minions.

February

Here is the calendar entry for Feb - so true!

January

Of course I also don't need to diet because I am as handsome as I can be already.

The best non-chocolate present ever!

Clair made me a special calendar because none of those available were good enough! I feel I should share this work of art with you all. This image is of the front cover - Lottie and Lexie (two of my favorite minions) drew me crowns (because as previously mentioned I rule) and chocolate. You can see me here with Bill Tong.

I'm King of the Castle...

and you're the dirty wee rascal!

Do Polar Bears like honey?

Triumphant

I consented to allow my minions to play me at one of their simple games. Being the ever generous monarch I am I allowed them a few pieces of "pie" before I rallied home in my triumphant march to the the centre using my giant intellect. I demolished all before me displaying my immense knowledge on subjects as diverse as the Spice Girls, religion and boxing.

Crown Jewels

My many minions have been commissioned to produce works of art to celebrate me, King Dumbledore. I have inspected this first offering showing a plethora of crowns representing my majesty and dominance over many kingdoms. I approve thoughrally, especially the preponderance of jewels bedecking each crown. Yes, that is appropriate.

Your majestic overlord,

King Dumbledore